“Million Dollar Listing LA”: Rock-A-Bye broker

Recap of Season 10, Episode 3

Is bigger always better in real estate? This week, the brokers of “Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles” find out that may not always be the case.

One of the biggest listings of Josh Altman’s career is causing a big headache in his personal life. Josh Flagg’s Rolls Royce and Rolex aren’t helping him sell a home in the Valley, while James Harris and David Parnes come to find that sometimes two listings aren’t better than one.

Here’s where we left off.

Baby blues

It looks like around-the-clock phone calls and pesky persistence actually impressed the sellers Eric and Ann, who ultimately acquiesce and award the Altman brothers the listing for Dovetail in Bradbury Estates. There is a condition, however. Josh and Matt must make themselves available 24/7 to do showings and field calls, complaints, questions and all of those fun things. Josh promises this won’t be a problem, which doesn’t sit well with his wife Heather, who’s going to give birth, like yesterday.

“I’m very happy to you and Matt got this listing, but I wanted you to do it on realistic terms,” she tells him. “This is so frustrating that you put this before us.”

Heather doesn’t have the time or patience to explain the importance of their unborn child. She’s off to meet Madison to iron things out before her life changes forever. The pair used to be close, until Heather co-listed a property with Josh and was unceremoniously fired by Madison over the phone. Madison said this was because he was emotional and afraid he was losing her. Six years later, they’re ready to bury the hatchet. Madison apologizes for cutting her out of his life, and Heather apologizes for throwing champagne on him.

“I think in protecting myself, I was hurting you more,” Madison says.

Heather receives a long-awaited apology

While Heather and Madison repair their friendship, Josh turns all of his attention to Dovetail. He knows everything must go right, which is why everything seems to go wrong. Upon arriving to the first open house, Josh and Matt find out that the event hasn’t been posted to the local caravan — meaning brokers in the neighborhood aren’t informed of the Nutella crepes being assembled at Dovetail!

Fortunately, Westside brokers are willing to make the 45-minute trek for crepes to see the listing, so they still manage a decent turnout.

Ye of the Valley

It’s time for Josh Flagg to go where no Beverly Hills broker has gone before: the Valley!

He meets with Karen, the developer behind a 6,000-square-foot Royal Oak estate reminiscent of a London townhouse. The house is a beauty, so Josh accepts the listing, though he’ll have to mingle with the locals in order to sell it for $5.65 million.

Only ye humble folk aren’t too keen on mingling with our Josh.

“The brokers are so f-cking weird, it’s like children of the corn,” Josh says.

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Charming!

It’s only when James Harris offers him some sage advice that things start to snap into place.

“Roll up your sleeves, take off your tie, don’t show up in a Rolls Royce, a Rolex and $300 shoes — they’ll probably love you,” James says.

To be fair, he’s wearing $3,000 shoes.

Josh puts his class differences aside [editor’s note: the show seems to be vastly underestimating the wealth that exists in the Valley, albeit for comedic effect!] and throws a mixer to meet more brokers from the area. He solicits an offer, which is great — only the prospective buyer is Kosher, and the house needs to be modified to reflect the lifestyle. Karen decides she’ll take a $400,000 hit on the asking price because she’ll make up some of the costs while installing dual ovens, microwaves, etc.

And it’s back to Beverly Hills!

To Encino we go

James and David Parnes are also Valley bound. They head off to Encino to talk about their diminishing sex life and meet with Evan, whom they worked with last season. The developer was in a bad way last time they met, and now he’s facing another hardship: his wife has been diagnosed with liver and back cancer, following a successful battle with breast cancer. He wants the brokers to sell two neighboring houses he’s developed: “Big” Valley Vista and “Small” Valley Vista.

“I’m very apprehensive to put both of these properties on the market at the exact same time,” James says. “But Evan is going through an emotional crisis right now, so if that’s what he wants, that’s what we’re going to do.”

Though they’re apprehensive about putting them on the market simultaneously, they price the homes at $7 million and $5.4 million, respectively. The plan is to sell the bigger home first to create urgency for the smaller, less expensive home. But when buyers show up for the first open house, what property do they flock to? The smaller, less expensive home.

“This is exactly what I thought would happen,” James says. “People are veering away from the bigger property and they’re focusing their attention on the smaller property.”

James and David bring Evan their concerns, as well as an offer that’s not full-ask for “Small” Valley Vista. He’s not having it, and demands the two brokers figure out a way to move both houses.

“You guys need to strategize, because this house needs to be sold — the big house,” Evan says. “The. big. house.”

Sounds like double trouble.