It was back to business last night on Million Dollar Listing New York after last week’s in-depth foray into Ryan and Fredrik’s personal lives. The honeymoon is over so to speak and the show’s focus returned to making us swoon and lust for over-the-top properties.
“Tell me what is in your heart” (and wallet): Fredrik is still in Åre to sell a pimped-out vacation home. Momentarily stunned upon seeing his bestie Anna show up to his open house with a new boyfriend, realizing his dreams for egg acquisition may be shattered, he shakes it off like a pro commenting: “I still have a house to sell.” He believes potential buyer Helene is his likeliest candidate for Sweden’s Next Top Buyer so he woos her by taking her dog sledding to show her “this is where Santa is from.” He is direct: “Tell me what is in your heart,” he demands, to which she explains the Sunset Peak property is what is in there, but in her wallet is only 11.5 kroner. Fredrik continues their little heart-to-heart while making it clear that he can only accept full ask. It is as simple as that; with a bizarre bout of snow wrestling culminating in Helene exclaiming, “You’re a snowy little man!” The deal is done for the equivalent of $1.4 million.
Later, when Fredrik and Derek finally confront Anna about donating her eggs, she blinks uncontrollably, saying she doesn’t feel it is the right thing for her to do. She wants them to be BFFs and hopes their children will someday play together. A distraught Fredrik returns to Manhattan to find the West Village townhome he was asked to sell is finally finished! Tom, the developer, walks him through the six-floor, 7,000-square-foot home, highlighting $500,000 accordion doors.
“I have no girlfriend. I have no friends.”: Luis is pitching his services to Garin, who owns Star Jones’ former four-bedroom triplex penthouse on 90th and Second. It boasts 1,500 square feet of outdoor space, complete with 270-degree views and one very interesting element: a golden shower. He installed it because his wife specifically asked for a golden shower and happy wife equals a happy life. Luis will do his best to sell it despite the bathroom looking like it was made for Donald Trump’s daily bath. He lays it on thick explaining to Garin he basically has no life because he is sans girlfriend, friends and family in New York, the figurative equivalent of a real estate monk. That wins Garin over, who agrees to list for just under $3 million.
Luis shows his Upper East Side exclusive to broker Richard Hamilton who, despite the garish shower, thinks his client will love it. “Every apartment has a drawback,” Luis tells us, but thankfully, this one’s not a deterrent; Hamilton quickly makes an offer on behalf of his client and eventually they agree on $2.9 million. Luis remarks that this may have been his easiest deal, but not so fast. After sending out the contracts, Hamilton goes MIA. Knowing “no news is bad news,” Luis tries everything, even resorting to trying Hamilton’s pager. Because it is isn’t 1990, there is no response and Luis must inform Garin they have to head back to the drawing board and “shove the listing down people’s throats.”
“Penicillin is a beautiful thing”: One would think penicillin would be referenced on the show because of the aforementioned golden shower; however, Ryan references the drug when agreeing to a bet with Olivia, his former assistant who is now an agent on his team. Ryan has just gotten two penthouses at 22 Renwick Street to sell: PH1, a 2,700-square-foot triplex with four bedrooms, 2.5 baths and an entire roof deck featuring 360-degree views and PH3, a full-floor unit with three bedrooms, 2.5 baths and 2 terraces. He enlists Olivia to help sell them, giving her the bigger, pricier one to handle from soup to nuts. She suggests a friendly wager: if she sells PH1 before he sells PH3, he will have to don a bunny suit and be her assistant for a day; if he wins she will have to jump in the Hudson, penicillin in tow. Game on!
When Ryan enters PH3 he is shocked to find all the furnishings are gone. He calls the developer to report the furniture theft, only to find out that Olivia relocated it to her unit upstairs seeing that she listed hers first. Not to be one-upped, Ryan attends her open house event and explains, “Olivia borrowed my staging, so I’m borrowing her clients.” They do tandem showings, until Emilia arrives and Ryan eagerly ushers her to PH3 explaining he’d like to buy it for them.