In the latest edition of “Million Dollar Listing New York,” all the answers to burning questions will be revealed. In the most shocking episode ever – just kidding, the same old cast of characters haunts the show – we discover the identity of not just a mysterious Central Park South owner, but also of the egg donor of Fredrik and Derek’s to-be daughter Milla. Toss in a bit of development eye candy into the mix and, for once, we have no desire to change the channel.
Here is what we learned this go-around:
“I think I’m getting aroused” – While Fredrik announced this in response to seeing an ultra-luxe new waterfront development project at 290 West Street, otherwise known as the Tribeca Riviera, it would more aptly be uttered when Zach Vella, hotter-than-hot developer and ghost of episode’s past, takes the screen. The only thing that qualifies more as eye candy than the $15 million top-floor extravaganza is “swipe-right” Zach himself. Because his latest project the Beekman is now 50 percent sold, Fredrik is eager to take on Zach’s project because Beekman was just “one ball” and he quips, “I like to juggle balls.” In a shocking twist, Fredrik actually prompts Zach to raise his desired asking price because of the true uniqueness of the project. Obviously, Zach is down with that, but not so down with spending cash on a model or pimped-out sales center. He’d rather “put the money back into the building.” However, Fredrik quickly sees his original assumption was correct: Buyers do not want to traipse onto a construction site and lack imagination. “Buyers buying luxury want to be in luxury,” he says.
“Soho is kind of like the Iggy Azalea of New York City … It’s so fancy” – Ryan is set to sell a freestanding tri-level, two-bedroom townhouse in Soho, complete with a “Zen oasis” and a whopping five bathrooms. One mystery never solved is: with only two bedrooms, who is using all those bathrooms? The seller, Roger, wants at least $11.5 million because of the additional air rights, which would allow the buyer to create a 6,000-square-foot palace. Ryan counters that they should set the price at $10 million and to “Get ready. It’s going to get crazy.” And crazy it does get: The obligatory agent jumping into the Jacuzzi tub scene rolls. When Ryan reports to Roger that the average buyer doesn’t want to build, but that he has gotten a $10.5 million offer, Roger replies, “10.5 is a snore.” He wakes up when Ryan gets the offer up to $11 million but oddly, later Ryan gets a call from the buyer’s broker that the deal is off due to a mysterious arrest. Roger spouts off a string of expletives and says he is calling another broker in the morning.
“My name is Luis. Mr. Ortiz, if you’re nasty” — Another disconcerting ghost re-emerges – developer Ian Reisner – to resume work with Luis on 230 Central Park South. Willing to be more respectful – no more Ricky Ricardo jokes – he wants Luis’ assistance in selling a combined unit. When Luis sees units A, B and C on the 12th floor, he suggests they “double the price, double the view” and add the additional two units on the floor to make an apartment with 75 feet of park views. It’s a baller move, for sure, but one Ian is willing to make. When Luis tells him he could get $25 million for the space, Ian enlists Luis to get the two owners to sell even though “buyout” puts fear in the hearts of many a developer. If the duo can acquire the remaining two units for under $6 million, a profit will be had by all. Luis is able to sell one for $3 million but has trouble locating the mysterious owner of combined units E and F. He plays Hardy Boy to no avail, until …
“A gift from God” – Ryan is contacted by Michael, the no longer anonymous-owner, saying he wants Ryan to negotiate a higher offer from Luis’ client. “Double the apartment, double the money” is Ryan’s mantra when he happily calls Luis alerting him that his client wants an absurd $10 million for the unit, which will soon have two towers blocking its view anyway. “Real estate is a sport, and I smell blood,” (insert evil laugh) cackles Ryan, leaving Luis dumbfounded, frustrated and disheartened.
“Manhattan: The biggest queen of them all” — Fredrik thinks outside the box and inside the boat, deciding to create his own floating sales center. What better way to highlight the majesty of 290 West Street than from the water away from errant lumber, trudging through water and the winter’s wind? The $20,000 launch party keeps agents’ and buyers’ attention, but what really makes Fredrik’s evening is when his and Derek’s bestie Lynn announces she has agreed to donate her eggs so the happy couple can have a child — a high kick-worthy moment if ever there was one.