Well, that was awkward.
Little did we know that the Bravo gods would summon a dinner party from hell to wrap up Season 10 of “Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles.” In other words, what we collectively experienced last night was nothing short of reality television gold.
Let’s not waste another second waiting to dive into this hot mess of an episode — that is, unless you’re Josh Flagg, who had closed out the season with a fairytale wedding at the Beverly Hills Hotel. He seemed to have a pretty okay night.
Everyone, please take your seats
It all starts when our British broker duo James Harris and David Parnes take on a $45 million listing on Stradella Road in Bel-Air. “MDL” favorite Zach Vella has completely transformed the 14,000-square-foot property into a hillside paradise, where it’s hard to tell if you’re inside or outside because the rooms just seem to float. It’s the Brits’ biggest listing to date, so obviously they’re going to spend a reasonable $50,000 to $60,000 to get it in front of the right brokers.
“There’s no way this property isn’t going to sell,” David said.
And hey, if it doesn’t, he’s only out $50,000!
The lavish party includes a 30-plus person sit-down dinner hosted by a renowned chef and lots and lots of cognac. And of course, the whole crew is invited! Tracy, who’s upping her new development marketing game, brings her husband Jason, who passive-aggressively guilts her about wanting to elevate her business but finally resigns himself to support her because they’ve had this conversation about 50 times this season. Josh Altman, who’s moved in one of Josh Flagg’s developer clients, arrives with Heather just in time for dinner. Josh Flagg and Bobby also snag an invite, yet we’re unsure if they’re actually married yet because last we left off, it was the night of their rehearsal dinner.
And then there’s Madison.
Though our Malibu-based broker made amends with James a few episodes ago, he arrives at the party ready to speak his mind … and drink, and drink some more. After developing a healthy buzz, he asks Tracy why she doesn’t have the Stradella listing, since her husband was the contractor on the project. Strike 1. Then Jason clearly explains that Vella went with the brokers who sold him the property, and Madison just shrugs him off. Strike 2. And finally, Malibu claims that James and David owe him a thank you for their commissions following the sale of Tantalus, despite being entitled to their fair share in the contract. Strike 3. David engages Madison, but it’s too late — he’s absolutely appalled at the way he’s been treated.
“It is the lowest of all lows for a listing agent to host an event and to provoke someone,” Madison said. “This is shocking and appalling and embarrassing.”
The Battle of the Joshes also comes to a head as the evening progresses and more and more cognac is consumed. Josh Altman wants an apology, but Josh Flagg’s only in the market for a selfie. The pair do a round of chest-thumping, and it’s clear this drama is going to drag on into Season 11.
If we make it that far.